Through the Pack

She was brave. She was bold. And it was yielded from the world, hidden deep within her spirit, which flowed as freely as the wind through the trees, but instead circled itself around our pack. So I saw in her, the one Elder I could always know.
We were a small pack, and in the eyes of the others, considered weak. But we pulled together, maintaining our stability one day at a time. Mother and Father were young and strong. They were the strength and the offense for all of us. Mother had a male sibling who was much older, but he was still quite strong. He had a mate, who had been found outside of the family generations, like my father. And then there was the Eldest, the mother of my Mother, and her Elder Male sibling. The Eldest was the helm of the pack, the engine and core. Without her we would all be lost, and unsure of what to do. We all feared the day she would pass and leave us confused in our grief. But she was graceful, and passive, yet wise and experienced. She held our pack together with the reminder that we were all individuals, but together we are one and we are strong. Survival will come if we strive for it.
I liked the Eldest a lot. She spoiled me a bit, always giving me her scraps, and showing me nothing but kindness. Of course her leniency led me to act out and I was eventually punished by Isolation. I did not like Isolation. It was so unnerving and all I could think of was being in the warm ambient presence of others. If anything I was all the more troublesome when re-introduced to the group after being Isolated.
Though however much I liked the Eldest, there was none other than the Elder Female. Her and her mate were quite the favorite of mine. They would play with me and teach me new things, while also giving me scraps as well, though only every once in a while. Although the Elder Male could be the rather aggressive one. Sometimes I was afraid to approach him for fear of seeing his large slimy teeth and his grizzly snarl. He asserted his dominance and it was known that the rest of us males do not break that barrier of Alpha Male. So I refrained from the Elder Male sometimes.
His mate was the one I enjoyed the most however. She was kind but when I was in trouble she could make me cower like not even the most wild and rabid bear. It was not aggression she showed, like Mother and Father. It was stern disappointment. A clean and sheer slice of faith in me shaved away in her voice and expression. I knew I was wrong at that point.
Such as one day, while Mother and Father were out scouting the land, I was being Isolated. I was to wait in Isolation until either the Eldest or the Elder Male and Female came to get me. It was eventually the Elder Female to release me from my torture. But in my lonely misery and anxious state I had killed a rabbit, shredding it to nearly nothing. Not even a bone could be salvaged from it's exhausted carcass. I knew I had done wrong, for Mother and Father would punish me for killing and wasting. There wasn't even enough of the rabbit for just one to get even half their fill. And when I saw the Elder Female I was so excited, but then she discovered what I had done. I looked down, ashamed of my actions. But instead of being punished by Isolation, or something equally as horrible, the Elder Female gave a quick growl and then instructed me to sit and stay in one spot until she cleaned up the mess. She would bury the remains and kill another small animal for our meal. All while I had to sit, wait, and watch. I suppose the Elder Female figured I had learned my lesson when she saw my look of obvious guilt and distress. Thus her instructions to just let me watch her clean up my mess only made me feel even more shameful.
However normally with others, I would not stay put. But I could not leave my boring post until say so, for a few quite good reasons.
Number one, the Elder Female always kept her eye on me. Even if she was not facing me, and I could not see her. I could constantly feel her yellow eyes on me, making sure I had not moved an inch. So I did not dare twitch or crawl. I knew she would catch me.
Another reason I did not move was that I much preferred sitting, watching, and waiting, than Isolation. At least I was not alone while forced in one spot watching the Elder Female dig a hole for the bloodied, shredded remains of the rabbit. I was with another and it was good enough for me. The Elder Female's punishment wasn't even really a punishment to me. I was voluntarily sitting and waiting, and because violence played no role, I felt my mistake deeply and I was truly sorry. I respected the Elder Female. So I sat by her side diligently. She even let me greet the Elder Male as he returned from hunting. And when he left our company again I eagerly trotted after him, hoping to go with. But then the Elder Female called me back and I could not make myself advance any further with the Elder Male. As sad as it made me, I returned to the Elder Female's side.
She was no tougher than then the leaves on the forest floor, and had no jagged sting of my Mother and Father's chastisement. Yet she made me oddly calm when I had done wrong. The Elder Female was not the Alpha Female, but she seemed to be an honest balance of the Alpha and the Eldest. Thus I respected her the most. With all her trials, she takes the pride of all of us and turns it into our Light. Weak she may seem but what others can and will not do, she will. Her presence lingers so subtly it's hard to see her as one from the pack and not as grey as the rest. However average she may be there is that humbleness she cultivates, and the modesty that she hoards, and she precipitates it through the pack.